guess who?

guess who came for a surprise visit yesterday?

most. amazing. thing. ever.

made my life.

and so therapeutic.

you better believe it was lauren celeste wertz.

it involved eating too much yummy food to the point of feeling disgustingly full. and a few pictures that were swiftly deleted. hahahahahahaha. anywhoooo. please don't ask when i last showered before these photos were taken. you don't want to know. really, you don't.

love this girl. thanks for saving my week and guaranteeing it as good.

{isn't she a beauty? i think these photos are aahhhh-dorable.}

breath of heaven.

this morning i woke up WAY too early in a fuhh--reeeeezing room. for good cause. i went to the temple.
and afterwards walked around the grounds as the sun rose and greeted the day.

the sunrise this day was beautiful.

{and i was thinking of my sara michelle, as well. god be with you till we meet again, sister ence!}

gorgeous as can be. god is good. life is beautiful.

[thanks for bearing with my mood swings about life.]

belief builds from scratch, doesn't have to relax

i may or may not be listening to this song over and over and over again.

i may or may not have put all my christmas music back on my ipod last night. and am currently listening to it. bliss. current favorite: o holy night. faith hill. utter bliss is my middle name. i. love. christmas. the music. the season. the spirit. the serenity of a calm winter's night. laying in darkness, entranced by the twinkling of christmas lights. heaven.

streaming-live

• i looked through old posts on la's blog tonight. and reminisced. what a year it's been. oh how life has changed.
• speaking of reminiscing. i was in heaven before i came to earth. and for some odd reason, i decided that i'd sign up for a hard life. why? i don't know. you'd think especially after this past few years of my life, things would mellow. so far, this does not seem to be the case. while some of those trials have proven beneficial, others--i'm still waiting.
• speaking of trials overcome. it was about one year ago [ish] that courtney and i began our stage of detestation towards one another. that history alone is quite an intriguing story in and of itself. but all i'll say here, is i've learned an awful lot about life and love in the past year.
• speaking of love. juuust kidding. this has nothing to do with love. [la, you are given permission to disagree.] i went to 2 farewells today. and therefore i reminisced about my history with these soon to be missionaries. and one particular memory came to mind during the talk of one of these soon to be missionaries which caused me to laugh. problem in church? indeed. and then i thought of more memories that were completely ridiculous. but none so funny as the one. ahahaha. sorry, suckers. i'm not going to write about it here. if you're desperate to know. come find me. and maybe i'll tell you. depending on who you are. hahahahahahahaha. oh my gosh i'm pathetic.
• speaking of missionaries. i'm on a missionary high today. quite frankly, if i happened to be turning 21 in the near future, i maybe would be considering going. but i'm not. and therefore i'm not. that is a decision that cannot be made until the time comes.
• speaking of time. i don't have enough of it. there quite literally is not enough time to get in all the reading i need to do.
• speaking of all i need to do. why has this semester been so ridiculous? why have i been so unhappy with most aspects of it? bahhhhhhhhh. i have no words. and i don't understand. i feel like i should be enjoying it, just like i enjoyed summer term and the learning involved therein. but i'm just not. which is frustrating in and of itself. longest rough patch ever, anyone? never have i had so many times within such a small time period that i just feel like sitting on the ground in a ball or curled up on my bed and bursting into tears. i really do have no words.
• speaking of no words. sometimes no words is the best policy. that's what music is for.
• speaking of music. this one has words. but it has been a full week plus some and i'm still listening to this song on repeat. all. the time. "i hate to see you cry, lying there in that position. there's things you need to hear, so turn off your tears and listen. pain throws your heart to the ground. love turns the whole thing around. no, it won't all go the way it should, but i know the heart of life is good."
• i like change. but sometimes i don't. and with this new semester? things are changing. and i don't really like it. ... that is all.

trust in peace

"Faith in the Savior requires more than mere belief...true faith requires work. When we strive to keep the commandments of God, repenting of our sins and promising our best efforts to follow the Savior, we begin to grow in confidence that through the Atonement everything will be all right.

...sadness and fear begin to melt away and are replaced by happiness and peace when we put our trust in the Author of the plan of happiness and when we develop faith in the Prince of Peace.

...He has overcome the world, that He will never forget or abandon us, for He has graven us upon the palms of His hands. I testify that those who keep His commandments will grow in faith and hope. They will be given strength to overcome all of life’s trials. They will experience peace that passes all understanding."

-Elder Wilford W. Andersen, General Conference, April 2010

library motivations

  "Speaking from an eternal viewpoint, we hope to continue learning until we become like the Lord and know all things and have eternal life in his kingdom.
  But even here and now, in this life, there are few things as important as proper education. As a Church and as a people, we have always been foremost in the warfare against ignorance and bigotry and lack of knowledge and understanding among men."
--Joseph Fielding Smith, BYU Campus Education Week Address, June 8, 1971

- - - - - - -

 "We live in a world where knowledge is developing at an ever-accelerated rate. Drink deeply from this ever-springing well of wisdom and human experience. If you should stop now, you will only stunt your intellectual and spiritual growth. Keep everlastingly at it. Read. Read. Read. Read the word of God in sacred books of scripture. Read from the great literature of the ages. Read what is being said in our day and time and what will be said in the future."
--Gordon B. Hinckley, Commencement Address, Brigham Young University, April 27, 1995

mealtime

"so what's wrong with making mealtime a joyous occasion?

 exactly my point, my dear friend snoopy. nothing at all.

i've recently come to make mealtimes my break times. on-campus, or at home.

the other day i played people watching with courtney. we saw a lot of stripe-wearers. and talked about how there are so many cute people here. it's almost overwhelming. actually, not almost. it is.

and on the days where i come home for lunch, i make myself a sandwich and watch pbs while eating. no, i am not joking. usually it's the middle of the afternoon, so it's arthur. yesterday it was a show about a dog named martha or maggie. i don't know the name of the show. or the dog. and today was the treasure chest: SESAME STREET!

it's not the same as it used to be. shame, i know. cookie monster no longer exists, and neither do bert and ernie. also, my favorite part used to be when they'd be walking down some hallway with a bunch of different doors. yep, doesn't exist anymore. sad what it's become just to make sure kids aren't getting crazy ideas like moving into a garbage can. because every kid would think that would be great just because of oscar. lame.

 the old school street is where it's at. these are the people of my childhood. member that black guy?

and especially the guy front right next to elmo? i loved him. plus all the characters, of course.

then sarah and i started talking about other shows we loved. barney. zoboomafoo. lamb chops. zoom. and then there's dragon tales, which was a little bit after our time, but we liked it anyway, even though we knew we probably shouldn't. i loved it.

such high quality stuff--and it is no more.

tragedy, wouldn't you say?

the time has come.

member this and this?

welp, tonight i accomplished a new feat.

first this:

followed by this:

i don't know whether to be proud or concerned about my life that led me to this point.

oh, and harold loves me. or i love him. one of the two must be true considering how much time we've been spending together.
ohhh library, library.

an epistle.

dear year two of my college career,

thanks for what will probably and is turning out to be, out of necessity, the hardest of all my years. by schedule, at least. these two semesters just might kill me. it's only the middle of the fourth week, and i'm already much farther behind in your studies than i ever thought was possible.  how about you take a little chill pill, yeah? my pillow would like to see at least a little of me throughout this year..harold can't be the only one seeing this tremendous beauty. because i am a beauty. every single day of this beautiful semester. yes, that was a joke. go ahead and laugh your little head off, year two. laugh it right off.

love, emily janette nevers.

"you know it's nothing new, bad news never has good timing.

then the circle of your friends will defend the silver lining.

pain throws your heart to the ground.

love turns the whole thing around.

fear is a friend who's misunderstood,

but i know the heart of life is good."

-j.mayer, the heart of life

what a good sunday. one of the best.

c.r.c.

and my personal favorites: though they are unusual.

especially the last one. i love the idea of it. particularly in sequence.

around this time one year ago, courtney and i had just recently met. we knew hardly anything about one another. and little did either of us know of the adventure that was ahead of us still. [october particularly. ahemm. note the gap in timing of when photos of us together were taken..]

i was recently looking back through those first parts of my freshman year and reliving all those little memories. and reliving the saga of courtney and i. what a pair we have come to be. amazing, really. and looking through these old photos was like a flashing view of that year together in images giving small glimpses--hinting at the enormously tremendous hidden meaning.

thinking about it and looking over and remembering some of those moments made me quite sad. for they were dark ones.
[i will not post any links to anything. if you're that intrigued, go digging through my old posts yourself.
and my labels are not yet completed and therefore that would be a useless resource.]
those dark days, i sometimes wish i never had to experience. and yet, it is those moments that made our relationship what it is today. and i can't speak for her, but i know i learned and grew immensely from our experience together. and by some miracle, we made it. we made it through that year of faith, hope, despair, and sadness. a year of learning. a year of growing. a year of being taught the ways of the universe that had nothing to do with anything academic. for this is true life-learning. being taught through experience, the ways of people. 

it broke my heart a little bit to think about, but above all, we must remember the most important rule of any life story:

there is always a happy ending.

174+172+171=love.

i've spent time with a lot of these lovely ladies lately. [with the exception of taryn, amy, kealani, and daylin--which needs to be remedied.] which reminded me how much i love them, and how great they are, and how great our friendships are. and how hilarious they are. and how much i love all those little things about them. seriously. i feel like i took it for granted living with them all [practically] last year. they are gems.

most recently:

ashley and courtney are just hilarious. and so great. pure smiles come to my face in their presence. lovely lovely ladies.

paige. pago. love her. we love creepin. and we thought she was a flirt? psychee. she's been a gem lately, and always. of course. p.s. sidenote. her sister is in france until next may and i'm super jealous.

danielle=priceless. love her too. and we have her wedding prepared for her. hope she doesn't mind.

cassi i haven't seen as recently. but i saw her this week. she is a gem too. ok, so that sounds overused. but i'm being quite serious. she'll always be mamma cass to us. always.

claira. well, claira is claira. though she's turned into suuuuch a girl lately. what the heck? odd. oh well. she's still as hilarious as always.

and the rest of you---i need to see you soon.

i love these girls. i realized tonight just how much i really really do. i want to be friends with them for years and years to come. i just want to soak them up as much as i can. and i feel like no matter what i try to say to describe how beautiful and hilarious and priceless they are--inside and out, it will not be eloquent enough to satisfy exactly how i feel.

all i can say, is thanks for bringing joy unmeasurable to my freshman year. a hard year, yes. but completely unsurvivable without people like these in your life helping you along the way and keeping you sane. and giving you breaks. and making you feel like you can rise to the top of the world, and are a great person, even if you didn't fare as well in an academic subject.

so really, all i'm trying to say, is:

thanks for being who you are.

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!

are words necessary? obviously not. these pictures are worth far more than any words. duh.

a final gem:

la nostalgie

the essence of my childhood.

i'm feeling quite nostalgic as of late. the past few days i can't stop listening to the above song or mr.radin's street. [which i mentioned here.]

i practiced sign with sherry today. it was a little overwhelming. and humbling. but good, nonetheless.

cars are such a hassle sometimes.

it's only wednesday, but what a week. and it's not over yet. and every week this semester will not be much different. oyy. at least i'm doing something with my life, right? though some days i like to think i'd enjoy flipping burgers.

la can skype now. dell pulled their act together. am i excited? maybe if i wasn't so tired and burnt out i would be moreso.

kaitlin slept for 11-12 hours last night. as in she went to sleep soon after i arrived home from class. jealous am i? of course.

tianne and i have new home teachers now. we're a little sad about it, but we also have skills in getting stellar home teachers. so we're good to go.

harold and i are getting very close this week. and i've decided i like his more secluded nooks and crannies better than the overrun areas. and maybe i kind of like being on a floor where i get no service. and maybe i kind of like spending hours down there in my own place of solitude, maybe perhaps slightly avoiding the imminent return to the year 2010 and the technological responsibilities to communicate that come therewith. sometimes i don't like to communicate. sometimes i just like to stay in my own head. way back when [aka only like 10 years ago and beyond], people didn't have an obligation to be connected and contactable by other people at all times. why the change towards needing everything at an instant? i'm slightly technology-opposed lately. besides musica, of course. technology is a blessing, yes. and the ability to communicate at a moment's notice across the world is a blessing, yes. but at the same time: it is a curse.

"for all the ones who gave until they died. don't you hold back. i can see in your mind and your mind will set you free...rise to the top of the world, america. america, don't you cry. lift me up, give me strength to press on." --imagine dragons, america

chase all the clouds from the sky. back to the days of christopher robin and {emy} pooh.

on my way to where the air is sweet

missin my laursykins a lot as of lately.

. .

p.s. can't stop listening to this tonight.

can you tell me how to get to sesame street?

what a message. sweepin' those clouds away.

3 percent. i'm good at this game.

dear future hubaroo,

goal in life: marry a man similar to richard g. scott or on track to be like him. he is so sweet. and loving. and i love seeing the love in his eyes and voice for his wife. i could tell he was aching for her. he is a sweet man.
umm. ben and rebecca? say whaaa? mind tripping seeing them. ha.
anyway, and so here it goes.

dear future hubby,
please listen to this fireside talk by mr.richard g. scott. actually, for all i know, you were there tonight or watching tonight. either way, please absorb all he has said. and all he didn't say, but showed through his emotions and voice and loving eyes. "pure love is a powerful component for good." and i will take good notes too. of course this is a two way street. we all know that. we will have lots of fun together someday. and will say i love you often {as in at least once a day. probably more}. i sure can't wait to meet you. every day gets closer to that day when that time will come where you will enter my life for the rest of forever. i sure hope you're having a ball in whatever you're doing right this second. just know, i'm thinking of you.
loving you always, emily janette nevers ________ [you'll be filling this blank for me]
<3

beerrocks

tonight. tonight was a good night.

i laughed until i cried for the first time since i don't know when.

it was therapeutic and nice.

cassi's beerrocks [ohhh my heaven]. i can't even describe how long i've been waiting to bite into one. oh right, allll summer. i've been dying. so so so goood! ahhh. i've missed you, mama.

our unfeigned excitement for the beerrocks to get out of the oven. and yes i know we look completely ridiculous.

ultimate rejection = no one showing up to cassi's partay until almost two hours later. and even then, only two people. [if you are reading this and are one who should have been there--you know who you are--then shame on you. you should feel guilty.] cassi. emily. courney. ashley. c'ést tout.

sense & sensibility =  classic. i had a few issues with taking characters seriously based on other roles they've played. but forcing myself past that: loved this version. ha. so many laughs and squeals of joy and heartache all within one movie. ahhhhhhh!

laughing. so. dang. hard. "i wish i could just skip past the drama and have the ending." "i haven't even gotten to the drama yet. if i were a movie, we're still in the first five minutes." "i want some drama." hahaha. oh i love chick flicks.

star spangled banner-whitney houston. cassi's a little bit in love. pure joy. and bittersweet, due to today's significance. we are the world. where were you when the world stopped turning?-alan jackson. the lord's prayer-andrea bocelli. mmmmm.

good day.

"please. you don't need to tell me that.

i read your blog so i already know

everything about your life."

-jennifer anne marie mckay

made my life complete. hahaha.

where were you?

i've had this song running through my head all day.

and i'm reminded of how much i love america.

i love that pride in my red, white, and blue heart.

and tonight, for the first time in almost 9 years,

i went back to that day and the parts of it i remember.

the parts so simple, and yet i will never forget.

5th grade. eastwood elementary.

before school started we were standing outside,

and melissa whitaker said, "did you hear about

the planes that hit those buildings?" "what?"

kit battle said, "yeah, the world trade center."

i had heard nothing of the sort in my morning thusfar.

all i knew of the world trade center was its lobby.

wanting to go to the top when we were in new york

a few years prior, but for some reason i don't recall,

not being able to go up. so all i ever saw was the lobby.

my mind flashed back to that lobby, and tried to

imagine or comprehend what they were saying.

i didn't. i got into school, and as much as i love

mrs.jensen, i will forever be mad at how we spent

that day. only for a few minutes that morning did

we go into mrs.miller's room to watch the news.

only for a few minutes did i begin to slightly

scratch the surface of this event's magnitude.

watching those planes pierce that steel, is an

image forever engraved in my mind. despite

not understanding the grave reality. it looked

like a scene from a movie to me--all these shots

flashing across the tv screen. and after not too long,

we returned to our own classroom, and that was that.

at the end of the schoolday [i remember nothing of the

day itself], we were given flyers to take home to our

parents. that of course mentioned these attacks. and

with those flyer's was mrs.marchant's voice over the

intercom, attempting to convey to us as elementary

students, what had happened. though i don't think any

of us really could, in that moment. as i recall, my walk

home that day was a windy one. and there was lots of

dust in the air. i came home to my dad saying that he

flipped on the news this morning just after i had left,

and saw what happened. and had come to walk me

home that day. and said that i would always remember

what i was doing that day when i heard the news. then

i remember sitting doing my homework in front of

the unceasing news that was broadcast that day.

and it felt like watching a scene from a movie. over

and over again. and then i am laying in my bed,

listening to delilah [i went through a delilah lovin'

phase. don't judge me.] and hearing her say that

this was a night filled with sadness. a dark mark

placed on the world that day. and it was then that

i realized that this was a moment much bigger than

me. than my life. than my city, or state. and it was

only in the years that followed that i came to

understand the true tragedy that is 9-11.

and that is a day, i will never forget.

we will never forget what they did there.

----

where were you when the world stopped turning that september day?

find

"I don't like work--no man does, but I like what is in the work,
the chance to find yourself."

--joseph conrad, heart of darkness

something worth fighting for

"...It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger, they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it's only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn't. They kept going. Because they were holding on to something."

"What are we holding onto, Sam? 

"That there's some good in this world, Mr. Frodo...and it's worth fighting for."

--samwise, lord of the rings,the two towers

(t.m.)

tender mercy[ies]:

temple.

french was not so bad today.

i can do this.

plus asl lovin makes any day complete.

the book for extra credit came in the mail today,

and all i want to do is read it.

scratch any other reading.

i find it so fascinating.

ha. i'm such a nerd.

ahhhhh. can't wait to get into my major!

"i think i could be an orkin man for how many bugs i killed in my code today"

-steven.

hahahaha.

love that.

life lovin'.



september the eighth

once upon a time.

many moons ago.

in the beautiful place called san francisco.

ann hales was born.

on the eighth of september.

and a many moons after that,

she had a boy.

and then another boy.

and then she had me.

which made her my momma.

i sure am lucky.

my mommy is the best.

seriously.

there's no other way to describe how great she is.

you'd have to know her.

and then you'd understand.

so, in lieu of trying to explain myself,

i'll just say:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!!!

i sure do love you.

and thanks

for being my mommy.

for all the times you sang me raindrops on roses when i was sad.

for rocking me to sleep as you sang my tears away.

for all the times you rocked me to sleep when i couldn't sleep.

for singing all my favorite songs.

for even taking requests.

i loved those lullabies. i still do.

les berceuses.

merci, maman. pour tout.

<3

{isn't she purdy?? some people say i look like her. what a compliment.}

me name e-m-i-l-y

sometimes, life can be confusing. sometimes, it's hard to figure out what you're supposed to do. what you want to do. what's best for you.

have you ever figured it out, with no real evidence or reason why?

sometimes, things don't make sense at first.

sometimes, they don't for awhile.

that's how i feel about my major. people always ask me why i chose it. what made me choose it.

i don't know.

welcome to my life. quite certain, those three words adequately sum up my life as a whole thusfar. for the most part, at least.

well.

last week i had my first day of asl. which is the first class i'm taking that is even remotely related to my major. and even though it's something completely different than anything i know. completely new subject, unrelated to anything i can do or have ever done in my life. despite all of this---i'm LOVING it. every little piece of it. i almost started crying during our first class. no, i am not exaggerating. my eyes got a little watery. my professor was talking about deaf culture, and i don't even remember what. and i finally had such a strong affirmation that what i'm doing is right. this arena of study, is what i want to do. and even though i don't know why. i know this is what i need to do. and yes, i find it fascinating too. even though i'm absolutely awful. i wasn't lying when i compared it to dancing. memorizing different movements, positions, etc. and i wasn't lying or trying to be humble when i said that i can't dance. because i really can't. and yet, none of that matters. none of it at all. because this is what i need to do, and i'm loving everything about it. i LOVE learning more and more about the language, even though i never even considered it remotely attractive earlier in my life. it's fascinating to me.

you know what? it sure feels good to finally find something that i truly love. love with my whole soul. i love it like crazy, and yet i hardly know anything about comd at all. i don't think i'll be changing majors. psyche. i know i won't. even though i hardly know anything about mine. i know enough. and that's all i need to know. i love every piece. and i am happy.

a thought or two. or more.

1. i'm on a blogging frenzy. and i can't stop. i'm too full of thoughts to be recorded.
2. i finally have a temple recommend again. busy beginning of semester bishop is hard to get a word in with. due to callings and new members and such. so i finally had to make an official appointment for during the week. ever since it expired last week i've been dying to go. seriously. and it's made me SO sad that i couldn't. literally. i'm ecstatic that princess claira and i are going tomorrow morning. even if it is reallyyyy early in the morning. i'm never letting my recommend expire ever again. i'm renewing WEEKS in advance from now on. or months. whatever it takes. go to the temple. as often as possible. it's a gift to have the opportunity to go. an honor, really. relish in it. and take advantage of it. you could never go too much, i think. love.
3. i am happy with my status of life right now. sincerely. everything about it. i love this time of life. the freedom to do whatever you want to do. the joys of learning. {sidenote--this means: kaitlin: no setting me up on dates just because. if i am going to be asked on a date, i want it to be legitimately sincere.}
4. i'm not as happy about all my classes. let's just say, the middle ages aren't my area of greatest interest. and i get a double dose of it. mmmmm. not quite ideal. bah. no wonder i'm not loving français. i'm stoked for later in the lit course though. we're even reading tartuffe. that's right. in it's original tongue. i'm psyched! there's always a rose even among the biggest thorns. i'm also stoked for the french civ class that i will take someday eventually when i fit it. i. love. history. [more contemporary, that is.]
5. A S L - - - see next post for my feelings on this. mmmm.
6. i've decided the problem. i love french. i love the culture. i love the language. i want to live in france. i just don't love everything about my classes. though i do appreciate them. most of the time, that is.
7. my bulletin board of love needs more love. it's looking blank and outdated. seeing as the sparse amount of pictures i do have are mostly old. besides two wedding invite photos.
8. i need more sleep in my life.
9. how i'm feeling = blahhhhh.
10. i'm in a music rut. any suggestions of new great things to listen to?? please share. seriously.

you were in college.

"there's too much french on your blog." -steven

"i put a translation!" -emily

"there's still too much. i can't ever read it." -steven

hahahahaha.

seven a.m. steven says the darndest things.

maybe you could learn french brudda?

p.s. once upon a time i wished i was living in france. oh psyche. that's every day of my life.

un plaisir

{don't judge me. i'm on a blogging frenzy, obviously.}

... par-dessus tout, un plaisir

robert sabatier

   «Pourquoi apprendre ? me dit un jour un adolescent sur un ton blasé. «Pourquoi apprendre puisque j'oublierai les deux tiers de ce que j'ai appris et que le reste ne me servira pas à grand-chose ? »

   J'aurais pu lui parler du rôle des études dans la formation intellectuelle. Se référant à la raison pratique, qui ne lui aurait répondu en évoquant les diplômes, les possibilités d'établir sa situation dans la vie, de faire une carrière ?

   Et on aurait pu ajouter que les études, c'est comme l'eau pure ; on l'apprécie quand on est dans le désert.  Et combien, parmi les défavorisés de la société, m'ont dit : « Et pourtant, j'étais doué. Ah! si on m'avait fait faire des études »...

   Mais pour répondre à cet adolescent moins blasé sans doute qu'il ne voulait bien le montrer, j'ai choisi d'autres arguments. En effet, cet aimable provocateur, ce charmant petit Socrate, pour sa délectation personnelle, voulait m'amener à entrer dans un jeu où il serait gagnant puisqu'il prévoyait mes objections et savait par quelles insolentes pirouettes il pourrait y répondre. J'ai préféré puiser dans mon expérience enfantine d'une pédagogie sauvage et dont finalement je ne me plains pas puisqu'elle a ouvert à ma curiosité les portes du savoir et fait de moi un éternel étudiant. Et j'ai évoqué une idée toute simple qu'on oublie généralement : l'idée de plaisir.

   Celui qui a le bonheur d'accéder à ce bien précieux, la culture, doit en connaître les joies. Malheureusement, ce n'est pas le cas du plus grand nombre. J'ai visité beaucoup de comités culturels d'entreprises. Il y a là des gens de bonne volonté qui mettent toute leur énergie à éveiller des intérêts pour le livre, le disque ou le spectacle. Ils savent que l'homme ne vit pas seulement de pain. Ils savent que l'accession à la consommation est une chose et que l'accession au savoir en est une autre. Il existe malheureusement des soifs de connaissances qui restent insatisfaites. La fatigue des journées de travail, des transports, le manque de temps et de moyens en sont la cause, et aussi l'abandon à la quotidienneté envahissante. Cela m'a attristé bien souvent, mais quel réconfort que de voir briller dans un regard une certaine flamme : celle de l'être qui découvre autre chose que son horizon limité de chaque jour.

   A cela et à ceux-là, il faudrait bien penser.

   Non, la culture n'est pas un mot abstrait, une entité administrative. Elle est un besoin, une nécessité, une nourriture. Mais elle est aussi, par-dessus tout, un plaisir.

Journal du Dimanche, 1973

obviously it is more meaningful in its native tongue, like anything. and this translation that i found is not very good at all. but this is all you have to work with. my apologies. for all you uncultured non-frenchies:

[... above all, a pleasure

robert sabatier

   "Why learn?" Told me one day a teenager on a jaded tone. "Why learn because I will forget two-thirds of what I learned and the rest does not serve me much?"

   I could tell him about the role of education in the intellectual formation. Referring to the practical reason, would only be answered by referring to the qualifications, opportunities to establish his position in life, to make a career?

   And one could have added that studies are as pure water; appreciated when you're in the desert. And how many of the disadvantaged in society, told me: "And yet, I was gifted. Ah If one had made me study "...

   But to respond to this teenager, less jaded, without a doubt, than he would want to show, I have chosen other arguments. Indeed, this amiable provocateur, this charming little Socrates, for his personal enjoyment, wanted me to get into a game where he would be winner since he foresaw my objections and knew by which cheeky antics he could respond. I preferred to draw on my childhood experience whose wild teacher training and which finally I'm not complaining since my curiosity has opened the doors of learning and made me an eternal student. And I evoked a simple idea that is generally forgotten: the idea of pleasure.

   Whoever is fortunate enough to access this valuable asset, culture, must know the joys. Unfortunately, this is not the case with the greatest number. I have visited many cultural committees of companies. There are people of good will who put all their energy to arouse interest for the book, the disc or the show. They know that man does not live by bread alone. They know that consumption is one thing and that the accession to knowledge is another. There are, unfortunately, thirsts for knowledge that remain unsatisfied. Exhausting workdays, transport, lack of time and resources are the cause, and also the abandonment of the everyday invasion. It saddened me very often, but what a comfort to see a light shining in some flame: to be discovering something else than his limited horizon of each day.

   In this and these, he should think well.

   No, culture is not an abstract word, an administrative entity. It is a need, a necessity, nourishment. But it is also, above all, a pleasure.]

cut it. quote it. moving on.

a few memorable words from the past two hours of my life:

"should we stone her..?"

-sarah

"ahhhhhh. i hate that you made brownies!"

-tianne

"you were over there mating!"

-sarah

"sorry that you have an upside down nose, kids. it's your punishment for me being shallow in college."

-sarah

"i feel like whenever i say something smart, i automatically lose my male audience."

-sarah

and then michelle jean wrote on my wall. in french. three posts long. and it was hilarious in every word. literally. hilarious. i sat in my empty room laughing as i read. love that girl. if you're curious. check my wall. and then pull up google translator. and you're good to go. that is, unless you know french? in which case, please make yourself known to me. a s a p. ["whatever that stands for...probably something like, 'act swiftly, awesome pachyderm."]  {p.s. michelle, if you ever even read this. [ha.] why did we not take any pictures when you came down to visit me that night last month?? i blame you.}

i love michelle. and this picture. mostly just because of her face. ha.

i love my [fake] family. aka fhe@byu. i'm stoked. ha haa.

:)

on another note: i miss lauren celeste wertz. creatively worded letter will be sent to dell soon. stay tuned. because i want to at last skype with her! come on dellaroo. get a move on it and ship that puppy. seriously though--i miss her.

ok french reading. and lots of other reading.

[times ten million.]

time for me to give you the smackdown.

at least the minimum for tonight. i could do that. i hope.

stud.

my brother is a stud. why is he a stud?

see here.

you would think it was my birthday.

i'm not complaining. 

best brudda evaaaa!

what happened?

life?

is that what happened?

rejected and acquainted

tonight's spiritual thought giver at ward prayer provided an interesting insight into-well, life, really, that she had heard in her institute class. and it was just for me [or at least i'd like to think so].

prior to the restoration, joseph smith sr., lucy mack, and their family were enormously poor. literally. they had no land at all--a characteristic quite uncommon for even some of the poorest of society's members at that time. they faced hardship after hardship. were depressed and down, with good reason to be. i don't blame them in the slightest.

and now here comes the twist. a different perspective.

from the other side, as they were mourning and crying and struggling through their trials carrying them around the east coast, what was our reaction? cheering. REJOICING. rejoicing in this turn of events that eventually led the smith family to palmyra. the place they needed to be for joseph jr. to perform the important work that needed to be done. it needed to be done for all of us. without it, we would be a world suffering in ignorance of glorious truths. can you even imagine such a lack of pure and divine knowledge necessary for our salvation? incomprehensible. she said that her institute teacher then followed this up by powerfully,  but tenderly saying, 'don't you dare get discouraged. don't you dare, regardless of the trial. you can't know of how important that moment could be in helping to shape you into the person that you need to become.'

the other day, i mentioned to kaitlin something that i had decided and become quite accustomed to. my unofficial middle name is rejection. i am well acquainted with it. far more acquainted with it than i'd like to be, in all honesty. lately in particular, i feel like i am surrounded with it while watching everyone else i know be heartily accepted into anything they desire. even a minor setback of temporary rejection is turned to gold by a success that soon follows. and then there is my life. not quite similar. emily rejection janette nevers. i'm used to being rejected from anything i try for. it's my life. any lack of rejection is a welcome relief. but in my moment of being selfishly discouraged, this sweet girl's tender insight threw a reality check my way. i'm just not to palmyra yet. the journey there may be treacherous and filled with sorrow, but it's also filled with joy. everlasting joy that can only be truly understood in the end after the sorrow and grief is given as experience to contrast it. and that contrast is a beautiful thing. i'm just not to palmyra yet. my own glorious palmyra.

"...he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.
he is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief..."

--isaiah 53:2-3

i find him to be the most beautiful of all, for he is also well acquainted with us all.

when you smile, the whole world stops

courtface received a special gift this week, in the form of being called as relief society president in her ward {i can finally say it, she's officially been announced by now}. she only had a minor freak out thursday night. only minor. and the result of this wonderful past few days of hers, are moments like this:

"i feel like stuffing myself until i'm the size of an elephant."

--courtney clarkson

"asl is like dancing with your hands. and i can't dance."

--emily [that's me]

"the world is just so wonderful! everyone is just so amazing and wonderful!"

--courtney clarkson

- - - - - - -

i like bright sunshiny overhappy and optimistic rs pres courtney. it makes me smile.

you can do ittttt! courty will be a wonderful rsp. and is already reaping the rewards of being filled with lots of love for her girls. hahaha. :)

it would be rad if one of the photos we took could have been remotely cute. oops. sorry. i don't specialize in cute. or remotely cute.

gems

fun find: this video. it's darling. the ending? love.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

another fun find: this other video. my favorite part is the lady that just walks around the board. hahaha. here's to fun living!

. . . . . . . . . . . . . .

i found this on my phone earlier today. this gem on its own easily made my day. hands down.