the charming gardeners of blossoming souls.

ergo.

a list of things for which to be grateful:

+ options. potential. the age when everything is at my fingertips.
+ there's a good groove going on lately at work.
+ roommates such as my favorite former chilean named sarah. and jilly, course.
+ spontaneously received phone calls.
+ laughter.
+ volunteering. the so-easily-opened-hearts of children.
+ a funny and perfect new russian professor.
+ ambitions. lunchtalk.
+ the goodness of people.
+ knowing. knowing that i will know.
+ an entire evening that i dedicated to spending with myself. that ended with laying on the ground alone in the park and staring at the sky//clouds//stars. because i couldn't tell you the last time i just got to be alone for more than five seconds and breathe. (best thing i've ever done. comes highly recommended.)
+ kharkov names at the temple.
+ people to love.
+ places to go.
+ dreams to achieve.
+ stars.

they roll upon their wings.

He comprehendeth all things, and all things are before him, and all things are round about him;

and he is above all things, and in all things, and is through all things, and is round about all things;

and all things are by him, and of him, even God, forever and ever. 

and again, verily i say unto you, he hath given a law unto all things,

by which they move in their times and their seasons;

and their courses are fixed, even the courses of the heavens and the earth,

which comprehend the earth and all the planets.

and they give light to each other in their times and in their seasons,

in their minutes, in their hours, in their days, in their weeks, in their months, in their years--

all these are one year with god, but not with man.

the earth rolls upon her wings, and the sun giveth his light by day,

and the moon giveth her light by night, and the stars also give their light,

as they roll upon their wings in their glory, in the midst of the power of God.

behold, all these are kingdoms, and any man who hath seen

any or the least of these hath seen God moving in His majesty and power.

d&c 88:41-47

if i should become a stranger.

i've written a lot of words in my day, some put together into more eloquent combinations than others.

but lately.
i can't find my words.
a proper сочетание цветов (color combination), if you will. as viktor the artist would say.

drafts and drafts with just a word here or there of the general idea i need to get out.
but when i try--



nothing.

subjects to write about? well, i've plenty of those.
and words? yes, i have words too.
but none of them are right. or rather, none in the right combination.

to really write, is to be lost in the words.
the words just come and flow right through the fingers.

but lately.
i can't get lost.
i can't find my words.

we've made the most.

 june 24, 2012:

june 20, 2014:

(look carefully. same rings. same fingers. two years later.)

welcome home, elder ricks mikey.

sister nevers / elder ricks.

donetsk, ukraine. / concepcion, chile.

provo / salt lake, utah.

we're home.

here's to bff favorite missionary twin cousins together again.

here's to family gatherings.

here's to restorations and coming home.

welcome home.

i had a dream so big and loud.

my new roommate reminds me of sister andrade. bestthingever.

newest summer goal for after the gre? i'm going to learn spanish. and i'm actually serious.

elder mikey cousin comes home next week. and then will be in ptown. i'm thrilled.

i never really recorded anything about my birthday. or my birfdayparty. what a shame. somedaytherewillbeplace.

i'm so much more relaxed since spring and summer began. and there's still several months to go.

spring has been good to me, overall. summer will too. i can tell.

the sun. sun is good for me. i can never get enough. heat warms my soul.

i saw multiple people i love this week. elder dykman (spencer?) was in town. and laurs came to visit.

i have red pants. so clearly i planned my fourthofjuly outfit. normal, right? #favoriteholiday.

i was so uptight when i first got home. i didn't realize how much, until now.

there's a relaxation and calm sinking into my bones. sun sinking into my bones. and. i like that.

there's more i could say. but for now, adieu. adios, amigos. (see what i did there?)

the ring is laurs's. clearly i'm not engaged. i was wearing it so it didn't get lost while we baked up a storm.
or in other words. i made her put the cookies on the sheet. #burnedem #cookiesarenotmystrength

and.

some songs i'm obsessing over lately,

some especially for while morning running and swinging as the sun rises:

(because a good playlist makes all the difference.)

best day of my life, american authors.

wake me up, avicii.

93 million miles, jason mraz.

breezy, conor oberst. (thanks to jilly)

gone for good, the shins.

all of the stars, ed sheeran. (thanks to laurs)

and current complete favorite?

gone, gone, gone, philip phillips.

give me reasons to believe that you would do the same for me.

and i would do it for you.

like a drum, baby, never stop beating.

like a drum my heart never stops beating. for you.

we come with purposes written on our hearts.

i have a hard time staying in one place.

there's a restlessness in my bones.

was i like that before my mission?

i don't remember anymore.

i moved a lot on my mission.

a lot of things changed frequently,

most often of which was my surroundings.

therefore. i became trained for restlessness.

therefore. staying in one place is hard for me.

since being home, restlessness consumes me.

but.

there's something to be said.

for consistency.

the consistency of the morning sun rising over the mountain.

the mountains themselves while everything else spins round.

as life swirls around and circumstances adjust, the mountains and sunshine remain.

so, there's something to be said.

for consistency.

life's a game made for everyone, and love is the prize.

. my life is filled with a lot of busywork. and. frankly speaking. i'm bored. it's not. enough.

. somehow i must fill life with more intellectual stimulation. my brain is rotting. on intellectualcruisecontrol.

. i have a few different things to write about. but when? coming soon.the east.

. work has been insane lately. until today. soslow. rush is almost over.

. i made homemade pizza with megan beth tonight for din din. and in the process cut my finger. oops.

. brudderstevie and i talk almost solely through text. modernlifeyo. i miss stevie.

. the u's comd department finally updated their website. much more appealing.

. i'm done with this whole gre thing. let'sbe. done. life'sgettingreal.

. my life. is a bunch of balls flying through the air. everything flying around. taking turns at the forefront.

. nevertheless. all this time i've been finding myself. god is the sun. and he is good.

. there's something beautiful about the phases of life. the ebbsandflows. nothing stays the same.

song of the day: wake me up, avicii.

cottage wisdom.

april.may.june.

over and over.

all year round, please.

here it comes, it's a light, it's a beautiful light.

over the horizon into [my] eyes.